Gratitude leads to presence

Samadhi...

Some samadhi seems like a real prerequisite for real prayer and real study of Kabbalah.

My undiscipline has served me well, too. Lightness. If I were still the Type A, 18 year old me, I would be too tight to let go, to be in this state, to not be in it.

Sharon: Mindfulness is "too puny a word for what it really is." Awareness. This was her response to a 'God question.' The Asker is the Answer.

From prayer, which took the negativity from boredom. Good old fashioned gratefulness really helps. Devotion has a place in practice. Gratitude for the gifts I have, reflecting on qualities of God. Now, less clinging to the narcotic aspect of samadhi.

Gratitude - > Presence -> Gratitude... but don't fake it.

God, help me be free from the need to boost my ego. What a relief that would be!

it is kind of in opposition to the "wake up and get life back on the rails" riff. But I could move forward with some of it with an awareness of what it is, where the traps are -- and thus with better skill and care, and less clinging. And less of it.

"Be all you can be" is an unnecessary burden.

Or, in Sharon's view, just leaning back some to get back in balance.

Mind free of hindrances: "Vast mindscape of joy, tranquility, clarity, effortless energy, ecstasy, bliss." These are U Pandita's "spiritual goodies." The goodies are a result of diligent practice, and a challenge due to attachment to them. But mindfulness leads to nonattachment.

Vipassana: To se clearly the three main insights: impermanence, unsatisfactoriness, anatta.